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My Big Fat Fabulous Life Star Whitney Way Thore Reveals the Cruel Insults That Led to Panic Attacks-InfoExpress

It's not news to Whitney Way Thore that the internet isn't always a big, fat, fabulous place. 

"You can't ignore it," the My Big Fat Fabulous Life star stressed in an exclusive interview with E! News. "I never go read articles about myself. I'm just talking about what comes into my own Instagram comments. And I know there's far worse out there." 

Not that she has any intention of digging that up, "I always say," the 40-year-old continued, "I wish I didn't know the opinions and innermost thoughts of random people."

While she doesn't put a lot of weight into what strangers think—no, she does not, in fact, believe "absolutely unhinged" takes like dad Glenn Thore doesn't love her—"It just makes me so sad and scared that people are like this, and this is becoming so normal," she explained. "That's what scares me, saddens me, dejects me. I'm like, 'Why is this okay? Why is it so pervasive?' And that just makes you feel really pessimistic about life and the world."

Unfortunately, the North Carolina resident has grown somewhat used to the abuse that takes place both virtually and IRL.

"I've had bricks thrown through my car window," she recounted. "People have broken into my parents' house while they were home. People come to my house all the time." See: The anonymous vandal who egged her house in the TLC series' season 12 premiere July 9, leaving behind a nasty note.

"I remember something in there about, like, my mother would be rolling over in her grave," Whitney recounted. "I've been in the public eye for 10 years now. You think you get used to it. Pretty much nothing surprises me anymore, but it's still just as horrible as the first time you read it."

Because even she was floored by the level of vitriol she received after her series' most recent season.

Following the December 2022 death of her mom Barbara "Babs" Thore—and a subsequent discovery that her dad had fathered another child before their marriage—people started using her mom "to talk s--t to me," Whitney revealed. "They would say, 'Your mother would hate this.' 'Your mother hated you.' 'Your mother was so disappointed in you.' I thought I had heard it all and when people started doing that, that's the worst thing anyone could ever say to me." 

And while she'd love to be the sort of person to brush off nameless, faceless haters as trolls or cruel keyboard warriors, "These are real human beings, real people with fingers that they're using to type these horrible things," Whitney explained. "I'm to the point where I go to the grocery store and I look over and I'm thinking, 'Is this somebody who is saying this stuff to me on the internet?'"  

The emotional trauma "does have a cumulative effect and it's hard," she continued. "I've been doing this for 10 years and I didn't think I was going to make it out. I really didn't."

Still very much grieving Babs' death, Whitney found herself suffering from panic attacks and suicidal ideations.  

"I sat down with my producers before we started shooting this season, and I just said, 'I am not in a good place. I need you guys to be patient with me,'" she recalled.

The experience inspired her to speak out more about the pervasiveness of cyberbullying. "I really wish people took it more seriously," said Whitney. "I would say, 'Treat people how you do in person.' But then, for me, it comes off the internet, and it's terrifying."

Which is perhaps why the reality personality assumed embracing a new decade would be a comparative breeze. 

"At first I thought, 'Oh, this is cliché and stupid," she explained of the moment producers sat her down and were "like, 'Talk about your midlife crisis.’ I was like, ‘I'm not in one, get off me.’ And a few weeks later, I was like, 'I'm there.'"

Because if she's being honest, she would love a partner to dance through life with. 

"I don't want to reinforce stereotypes like, 'Oh, your life's over at 40,'" she noted. "But I'm feeling real feelings about being 40 and unmarried and no kids."

And with several of her close friends settling down, "I just feel more alone," she summed up. "And that's hard."

Having bid adieu to her mystery French boyfriend, she's been doing her best to seek out new dating possibilities.

"I definitely have been trying to be less isolated, do things that I enjoy and that does bring some joy, and obviously puts you in positions where you might be able to meet someone," she explained. "But in Greensboro, the pickings are so slim it's tragic."

Still, she's going to keep on grooving, she insisted. 

"What's the alternative?" she reasoned of getting back into the dance studio and making it a point to take herself out to ball games and concerts. "Am I going to rot for the next 40 years? I've got to find some happiness."

So she used her birthday as a reason to commit to finding the fun and focusing on what she has in life—friends, family, a thriving, televised career—and less on what she doesn't. 

"Well, it's a lofty goal," she joked, acknowledging it can be a struggle to do the glass-half-full thing. "Just because I wrote it, doesn't mean it's happening. I strive for it."